I once met a man who had over 5000 contacts in his palm pilot. These were not simple names in a device that he scrolled through only when he needed a particular service, product, venue, or contact to accomplish the task at hand. These were REAL people, that he knew personally and by first name, he had met and made a point of getting to know so he could decide if they would make it to the ever important contact list within his palm pilot. I have to be honest, I didn’t believe him at first. I mean really, who knows – personally – every single contact in their phone, palm pilot, or berry? I know that at that time I could open my phone, scroll through the contacts, and find at least 2 or 3 people out of 10 that I really had no clue who they were, why they were in my phone, or worse… how they got there! Today, I try to know everyone in my contact list by first name and more over, what they do, how I met them, and most important – who they REALLY are and what they are trying to do in life.

I tested this man. I asked him if I could look through his palm pilot and randomly pick some names out of the list and question him about them. He gladly agreed and quickly put me in my place. You see, he didn’t just put in a name and phone number when adding a contact. He added who they were, where he met them, what they did for a living, and what it was they were trying to accomplish when he met them. I scrolled through the list and grabbed a name every so often and began my questioning. Not only could he tell me who they were and the information contained on the palm pilot, but he could tell me the last time he talked with the person, where they are today, and if they had reached their goals or were still on the pursuit. I was amazed to say the least! We are talking about a crap load of contacts – over 5000 and growing.

The really cool thing, he wanted to teach me why he did it. He told me the how, where, or that anything else in the process didn’t matter as long as I understood why and that I would figure out the rest along the way from my foundation of WHY….

“Everyone you meet – everyone, everywhere, in any setting or place, in any profession or trade, or from any background has something to offer you – IF you are willing to listen, learn, and give what you have to offer, even if it’s just your ear at the time, respect of listening, and getting to know them better – AND you must be willing to commit your time to finding what you can help them achieve.”

This is a strong statement. It changed everything for me. I know, I know, it sound simple…DUH. But really, it’s not. It is the basis of music marketing and the foundation of how to network with others to reach our goals. I have handed my phone to people to many times to remember to have them add their information in my contact list so we could “re-connect” later. LOL, I assure you these are the 2 or 3 contacts out of 10 that I have no idea who they are, why they are in my phone, or how they even got there in the first place.

Networking in the music industry is the most important part of your business. It is what you will rely on most often to get what you need, find resources, advance your career, and above all – get what you need to advance to the next level. Too many people, myself included until I met this man, do not put enough value on relationships today. The internet is doing to networking what TV and video games did to us as kids. I can remember before cable TV came to my neighborhood all the kids would would meet out by the telephone pole and decide if we were going to go to the creek, play hide-n-seek, or work on our tree house down in the woods. But as soon as cable TV came, BAM! Fewer and fewer kids came around to play together. Then when Atari introduced the 2600… that sealed the deal. Only those of us whos parents wouldn’t spring for the game console ever met at that pole again.

The internet today, it’s is the same thing all over again. No one takes the time to learn who the other is, where they are coming from, what they are trying to achieve, or what their plan is to reach their goals. Sure, you might “add a friend” – and I bet you are proud of your 42,000 friends. But really, how long has it been since you met them out at the telephone pole? Don’t get me wrong, the internet is a huge advantage for networking. But like the TV and video games of my youth, there are many bells and whistles that pull people away from actually interacting with one another for promises of MORE FUN! The worst thing, even when we are offline and meet people we have learned to exchange information – i.e. email addresses with promises of getting to know one another better online and exchanging information there… where se can add it to our contact database. How ofen have you done this? How often did you connect with that person after that brief meeting?

I learned a lot from this man. He became my mentor. Here is what I learned… and once I understood the why, as he promised, the rest was easy!

Meeting one person at a gathering, on the street, on the internet, or anywhere…. and actually getting to know that person – taking the time to exchange information, ideas, goals, etc. is worth more than meeting 100 people and not knowing anything about any of them. He taught me to slow down, take the time to build a relationship with each person I met in life, and record the details. He said I needed to stop my wrong thinking of the more people I meet the better and change it to the more relationships I build the better. Then he gave me the key… I had to actually help that person, in anyway I could, achieve their goals before worrying about my own. In this exchange, every time, the other person would in some way help me when I needed it. Strong!!!

What does all this mean? It means slow down. Talk. Exchange ideas. And most important, when you add someone to your contacts list make sure you actually know them and can call them a contact. Then, and only then, can you truly reach for your phone and call anyone on your list and get what youneed when you need it. It’s called networking. In today’s very fast paced world we all too often forget that networking is about helping one another, not simply exchanging phone numbers. It’s about building strong relationships with everyone you know and committing to really being a friend, not just a name on a list. Most importantly, it means stop worrying about how many people you meet and start concentrating on how well you get know who you meet.

Networking is the backbone of the music industry! Build your list of contacts into friends, find ways to help those friends, and your reward will be a network of roads to your own success.

Peace,
Jai
“Love the MUSIC in Yourself, Not Yourself in the MUSIC!”